what do u recomened i use im not actually sure which gear to run or what actuated locker would be the best buck
I have no experience with gearing recommendations for the NV3550. Do some searching and I'm sure you'll find a general opinion on it.
The choice in lockers is somewhat dependent of your budget and desires. Most people on this forum will not do their own gears for various reasons. If you can swing it, and feel that you need them, put in selectable. Otherwise if you decide you want them later on, you will be paying for labor again. What locker you pick is up to you to do some more research.
I run lunchbox lockers front and rear mainly due to their cost. I got the front one for free and the rear I bought a year ago. I'm happy with them but they do have their downfalls. If I had the funds, I'd put ARBs in. I can do my own gear and locker installs so paying for more labor at a later date is not an issue for me.
I would consider upgrading the front axles to 30 spline if you're going to lock the front. Not sure if the spider gears in the ARB are upgradable to 30 spline once you break your 27 spline axles.
Know what you want before you buy.
Opinions are divided on this. Many will advocate sticking to 27 splines so spares are easier to deal with. Note that even if you do go to 30, only do it with the inners. 30 spline outer options (stub shafts and unit bearings) are limited and haven't been real succesful.
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Ideally you need to have a Dana 44 or equivalent in the front to run 35's IMO. I love the ARB I have in the rear and will do ARB again in the front soon. I was twisting 30 spline moly axle shafts in the rear until I put the ARB in and went to 35 spline shafts.