[FlyersFan2009]

When someone puts in for Child Support in Dallas, Texas, the procedure requires finding out who the father is to determine why he is not providing support. The following are responses entered by Dallas women on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing fathers' details.

These are actual excerpts from the forms. Reviewers felt that number 10 was very good - it took the prize in their collective opinion; number 2 ain’t bad but number 3 was 1st runner up.


1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.


2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child, as I was being sick out of a window when taken from behind unexpectedly. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps. (WOW)

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you send me his phone number? Thanks.


4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto heel in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service departments in this area and see if he's had it replaced.


5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.


6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.


7. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borne at the same time....well I don't have a clue.



8. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Disney World; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.


9. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.


10. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby. After all, when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

[opiv]

Pedro Martinez or the Yankees.

[martinsburgjeep]

#10

[trailboss]

my god....thats too funny....

One time my brother had to go to court and pay 600 bucks for a paternity test cus some chick claimed he was the father of her child...turns out my bro had the same name as the guy she said knocked her up...so the court just ordered EVERYONE in the state with that name to get a paternity test (at their individual expense of course!)...they just went through all the county phone books...unreal.

Thankfully he wasnt the father...course thats 600 out the window...they said he could sue her for the 600 after the test....but she was a toothless jersey skank...waste of time....

[98JEEPTJ]

My buddy went in to a court ordered paternity test and there was fifteen other guys there for the same chick he said there was a fiew from every corner of the world, The best part of it all is that its his.....there were 14 guys in there cheering and Chit and he just sat down and started crying seriously....After the day in court the chick thought that she was just going to move in and dady was going to take care of them she went up to him and said we need to get the car seat out of my moms car so we can get home and get this behind us....The best part is dude got married a fiew months before the paper work came for the test and he recieved his marriage paper work and the court order the same day...His wife was a little upset she almost filed for divorce the same day...Jerry Springer Chit really...I think this is the funniest story in the world. We aren't obviously friends any more but I tell that story to all of our friends who don't know...God that guys a freakin retard...

[Tri_X_Troll]

This dude I know married his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant. The baby came out black, and Bill is the whitest guy I know. The dipstick still thinks it's his.

[wyldejackyl]

Originally Posted by Tri_X_Troll

This dude I know married his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant. The baby came out black, and Bill is the whitest guy I know. The dipstick still thinks it's his.

Like this guy?

He should know that once you go black, you never go back. The African Man Root is a powerful tool used on many white women to bring them under infinite control.

[Jeepsterboy101]

Originally Posted by wyldejackyl

Like this guy?

He should know that once you go black, you never go back. The African Man Root is a powerful tool used on many white women to bring them under infinite control.

hah man I haven't seen that movie in forever!

Jim Carrey is the man.