"I haven't seen a beating like that since someone put a banana down my pants and let a monkey loose!" (Vegas Vacation)
"I am serious... and don't call me Shirley." (Airplane)
"In Southeast Asia we'd call this kind of thing bad karma" (The Burbs)
" 'Bout a nine on the tension scale there, Reub." (The Burbs)
"Hey, once they get in here, [points to Ray's head] its over pal." (The Burbs)
"We'd have more luck playing pick-up sticks with our butt-cheeks than we will getting a flight out of here before daybreak." (Planes, Trains and Automobiles) (you have to plug in your own ending of course).
"If I wanted a joke, I'd follow you into the john and watch you take a leak. Now are you gonna help me or are you gonna stand there like a slab of meat with mittens? " (P,T&A)
"You can start by wiping that fxxxing ******* smile off your rosy fxxxing cheeks!" (P,T&A)
"So, what's the etiquette on boners here? Do I role over and dig a hole out or just let my flag fly? " (Euro Trip)
"Oh, scuzi, mi scuzi" (Euro Trip) (You have to see it to understand)
Waiter: [Scottie tosses the waiter a nickel] Ah! A nickel!
[waiter shows his manager]
Waiter: You see this?
[slaps the manager]
Waiter: I quit. I open my own hotel. (Euro Trip) (I do it when I get change sometimes...well, I don't actually slap anyone)
"No, no, no, I get it, yeah. He's the girl, then you're the girl. Sometimes you're both the girl." (Euro Trip)
"Administer the Testicle Clamps! " (Euro Trip) (Never actually used that one, but I'll try to fit it in at work today)
All time great:
"I love the smell of napalm in the morning!"
99 TJ Sport I64L Manual 31x10.5 RE 3.5" Super Flex 1"BL 3.73 gears w/LockRite in front. Warrior Safari Rack.
"When you honestly believe you can compensate for lack of skill by doubling your efforts, there's no end to what you can't do". www.despair.com