Just back from the dealer with a box full of fluids and parts. The front differential actuator is a slightly different part number than quoted earlier in this thread and cost me $50.20 before taxes. New part number is 52114003AF. I will be changing fluid and installing the actuator tomorrow in hopes it fixes my problems.
Here's an update: I pulled my front diff cover today after picking up the diff fluid, friction modifier, sealant, and actuator solenoid. I pulled the cover and removed the original actuator. Unfortunately, the wires on the actuator connector were extremely brittle and the wires broke at the connector while disconnecting it. I ran back to the dealer and picked up the 21 dollar harness and installed it with no problem. The wires were a bit longer and I hope they won't get caught up inside the differential. Should be ok.
I reassembled the diff and added the synthetic fluid and friction modifier, then buttoned up everything. This is a fairly simple job but it is fairly dirty and time consuming, so plan on a couple of hours minimum. It was late when I finished so I did not test drive to see if the 4 wheel drive warning message still appeared. I wanted the sealant to set up overnight anyway.
The top three 5/8" diff bolts are difficult to reach. I was able to get to them with a short socket and a breaker bar, but I suggest a 5/8" swivel head gear wrench.
Buy the wiring harness along with the actuator solenoid. the connector is brittle and difficult to remove and chances are you'll need a new harness anyway.
Use quality RTV on for the cover. I bought the orange Mopar sealant and it worked great.
Follow the proper torque sequence while tightening the cover bolts. Torque two the bolts over two or three passes and don't over tighten.
Use a clear 1/2" hose on the top of the diff fluid bottle while filling the case. I tried a 1/4" hose and gave up after spilling fluid everywhere. I ruined a good T-shirt from my Alaska vacation ha ha.